Do Bored Economics Professors Deserve Tenure?

August 29, 2011 by  
Filed under Fools of Finance

The U.S. has too many unprepared and unmotivated students attending too many lousy colleges. (I use the word “students”  loosely because being a student implies that there is actual “studying” involved. A more accurate term would be “attendees” because so many college attendees place studying well below drinking, partying, and hooking-up on the list of must-do college activities.  But I digress.

There are a few college professors who (a) know how to teach and (b) have knowledge to impart that has value outside the ivy walls. Based on the performance of the academics whom Obama recruited to guide our economy, most economics profs are not part of the “few.”

Helping to support my argument is a professor from the University of Texas. His idea is to extend special legal protections to ugly people.

Yes, being ugly is a “disability.”

I’m sure there is data available to back-up his argument that ugly people don’t make as much money as the beautiful people.

But do you think that is true if we exclude movie stars, pole dancers, and supermodels from the survey?

This is just another professor with too much time on his hands because he only teaches 8 hours/week.

I want to see the economic data on stupid people. Surely the colossally stupid are worse off as a class than the merely ugly. Isn’t that why we have blond jokes?

I don’t like involving lawyers in this “give me money because I’m ugly” business.  With so many lawyers looking for work, those of us who thought we were just homely or unkempt would be demoted in a hurry.

Perhaps we should create a compensation fund for graduating high school seniors. If they are ugly, we give them a $25,000 bonus to help them overcome their appearance disability. If they are stupid, we give them $50,000. If they are both, we give them the maximum “you are ugly and stupid” graduation bonus of $100,000. We should probably delay payment after announcing that bonus because some of the ugly and stupid could become professional athletes.

The learned professor questions how we would determine who qualifies as “ugly.” That would be easy using my graduation bonus plan.  Just ask the cheerleaders.  However, it would be a conflict of interest for cheerleaders to also determine who qualifies for the stupid bonus. I’m thinking chess club for that task.

If you want to learn more about the genius ideas from the bored professor, here is the link. Do Ugly People Deserve Legal Protection? Economics Prof Offers Reasons for ADA Extension.

Feed Mr. ToughMoneyLove

FREE UPDATES: If you enjoyed this, please subscribe to receive the newest hard truth from Mr. ToughMoneyLove automatically by RSS feed (what is RSS?) or by spam-free Email.

  • Banner


2 Responses to “Do Bored Economics Professors Deserve Tenure?”
  1. MasterPo says:

    I wonder if cosmetic surgery will be covered under Obamacare to fix the handicap of being ugly?

  2. Wow, you’re completely misinterpreting Hammermesh’s op ed. He’s not advocating for protections for ugly folks, he’s doing a thought exercise and explains both the pros and cons.

    One thing professors do is they explore ideas and options and lay out the costs and benefits, which is exactly what he’s done.

Speak Your Mind

Please leave a comment and tell us your version of the hard truth...

You must be logged in to post a comment.