Why You Should Purchase a GM Vehicle Now
After careful analysis, Mr. ToughMoneyLove has concluded that everyone who can qualify for a loan should purchase a General Motors vehicle as soon as possible. These are my reasons:
1. GM is now being run by a White House central planning committee. Just imagine all of the creative designs that will flow from such a government enterprise! Remember all of those fantastic Soviet vehicles designed by the Politburo?
2. GM warranty work will be provided by our federal government. Peace of mind – guaranteed – by Democrat and Republican Goodwrenches and Goodwenches.
3. GM assembly lines are staffed by union workers who are so happy and content with current conditions that build quality is assured. No soda cans rattling around inside your door panels!
4. We must sacrifice our retirements for those GM workers who retired before us, after having so ably led GM to the promised land.
5. When Chevy says it’s “Like a Rock”, it really means it. That sinking feeling is overwhelming.
6. And if none of the foregoing motivates you: Remember Pearl Harbor!
Oh, and enjoy this first day of April.