The Cynic’s Activity Guide to Contentment in a Bad Economy
I admit it – I am a professional cynic. I also believe in using a little cynical humor to lighten the mood when things aren’t to my liking. Sometimes that humor contains hard truth that comes at the expense of others. But I mean no harm. I just want my money back.
Today I experienced a burst of cynical energy coupled with a need to smile my way out of economic gloom. This is the list of activities that resulted from that combination of character traits (or flaws). Yes, it’s a strange way to find contentment in tough times but it works for me. Maybe it will work for you as well. I hope it sets a positive mood for the rest of the week.
2. Proudly display a “Honk if I’m Paying Your Mortgage” bumper sticker. Or if you are one of the irresponsible homeowners, make that a “Honk if You’re Paying My Mortgage” sticker.
3. Practice gratitude (and pay it forward) for not owning real estate in California. (If you live in California, substitute Nevada, Florida, or Arizona, the other big real estate disasters.)
4. Learn the Johnny Paycheck tune “Take this Job and Shove it.” You might want to sing it on that final day of employment. If the final day has already passed, perhaps add “Up Your …….” to the hook line.
5. Think of a clever nickname for your personal government employee. The way things are trending, each of us who still pays income taxes will have one. I’m thinking “SpongeBob” for mine.
6. Be the first on your block to learn the real meanings of “socialism” and “Ponzi Scheme.” Never have so many misused so few words.
7. Invent the drug that treats ID (Investment Dysfunction.) I don’t know about your situation, but for my investments, the “moment is right.”
8. Start an investment club. Hold a meeting with yourself.
9. Watch reruns of the Newhart series finale. Hey – it could all be a bad dream …… right?
And if you run out of ideas and have time left over ….
10. Count to $1 trillion in $1 million increments. Report back here when you are finished.
That’s the Mr. ToughMoneyLove cynical activity list. Do you have any to add?
Image credit: Craig Jewell